Waiting For You
by TwiTFotVcontest
Summary: Sometimes when you've lost all hope is the very moment when everything you dreamed of comes to be. Entry for The Fruit's on the Vine Twific Contest


**The Fruit's on the Vine TwiFic Contest**

**Title: **Waiting For You

**Pairing: **Bella/Edward

**Genre: **Family

**Summary: **Sometimes when you've lost all hope is the very moment when everything you dreamed of comes to be.

**Disclaimer:** The author does not own any publicly recognizable entities herein. No copyright infringement is intended.

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_**My first child had the most perfectly round face, with skin as soft as a rose petal. His skin always smelled of lavender and baby powder, his head crowned with jet black hair; from the first moment that he was laid in my arms I knew my heart had been stolen. Watching as my husband cradled him against his chest and sing softly to soothe him through the sleepless nights, I knew my life was never going to be the same, and nothing could make me happier.**_

_**After two years of trying for our own baby, endless tests telling me that my body would never be viable for pregnancy, I was holding my dreams in my hand. For a brief moment in time, it was perfection. Then came the court system. Handing over Elijah was the hardest thing I had ever done. That day seems to play out in my mind like a nightmare that I'm standing on the outside watching. No control to stop the horrible injustice from happening. **_

_**Edward was my rock, and the only reason I kept hope in the weeks that followed. Everywhere I went, everything reminded me of Elijah. I longed to have him back in my arms, to see him smile just once more. I detested the amount of sleep I could attain in the night. He may not have been the child of my body, but he was the child of my heart. **_

_**I felt as if the months we'd had with him had been our bliss and the first time that I didn't feel as if I were less of a woman because of my inability to conceive. We knew going into this process that fostering to adopt was not an easy or fast process, but we had let ourselves hope against hope. Listened to the caseworker assure us that the birth mother had no hope of regaining custody. **_

_**Putting the pieces back together was slow for us. We felt lied to, betrayed by the system that was supposed to give children a second hope. I had us removed from active care for months. I knew that, in our grief, we wouldn't be what any child needed. The adage that time heals all wounds is a lie, but it does ease them.**_

_**Seven months after we lost Elijah, we were blessed with Lilly and Christopher. From the moment they arrived at our house, I knew that no matter what happened, I could never regret our decision to do this. I longed so desperately to be a mother; however, even if I was never intended to be a forever mom, I promised myself that I would give everything in my heart to these children in the time they were in our lives. **_

_**My new children had been strapped into car seats and left alone for hours on end. The idea sickened me that anyone could be so cruel to small children. At four months old, Lilly didn't know how to be loved. It took months of gentle caring, hours on end of cradling for Edward and I to ease them into a healthy life. It was easy to think I could keep my guard up and love these children while constantly reminding myself it wasn't forever. After six months in our home, we received a call because their mother had given birth to a new baby they wanted to place with us as well. There was no hope of any guards being up. These were my children. All three of them. We picked Olivia up from the hospital. She was this extra bonus that we treasured as we walked out of that hospital with a newborn. I dared to think that perhaps these were intended to be our forever children. **_

_**Lilly's first word was Da-Da; Christopher used to dance around excitedly in front of the door whenever I announced it was time for Edward to come home. In the middle of the night when the colic would strike, a song from Edward and a gentle waltz were the only ways to soothe Olivia back to sleep. When it came to our children, he was a father of the most superb kind. Just when I didn't think it was possible to love him anymore, and then I saw him as a father.**_

_**Forever wasn't a word that was intended for these children in our lives. I would love them forever, always cherish the time we had been granted with them. In my heart, they would always be my children, but a relative stepped up when parental rights were terminated. I would love to say that handing them over was easier than it had been Elijah, but it wasn't.**_

_**The aunt that assumed custody of the children asked for my email, and periodically, I would receive correspondence with updates on the children. Seeing their sweet faces and that they were doing well in their new home helped the healing process.**_

_**We decided upon taking a little time to ourselves before we returned to active care. This time, we took on a different role, primarily taking children into our home on a short term basis. Emergency care placed children with us while relatives or other foster homes could make arrangements to take them in long term. We loved on them, got them new clothes and supplies they needed and had them seen by the doctors.**_

_**At the same time, a new school year was beginning, and Edward's youth ministry began expanding. We were busier than we had ever been, and we mostly saw one another in passing or while we fell into bed at night. Even with our busier schedules, I never worried about our marriage. Edward has a bigger heart than anyone I know. His greatest desire is to see the desires of others come to fruition.**_

_**Which would be why he got a second job in secret. Over the years, we had looked into treatments for my condition and alternate means of having a child, but at the end of the day, all of those solutions were well beyond the means of a youth pastor and teacher.**_

_**When Edward's hours lengthened, I assumed his responsibilities at the church had expanded. It wasn't until months later when I found myself dragged to the new pirate-themed restaurant in town for a girls' night that I discovered the deception that had been taking place under my nose when I literally ran into my husband dressed as a pirate. While he was lending his musical abilities to Treasure Cove for entertainment, our savings were growing steadily, but as a couple, we were growing further apart.**_

_**I was torn between hurt and affection. That he would put himself through all these hours spoke volumes of his love for me, but deception in any form hurts.**_

_**We took a step back and once more removed ourselves from active care, this time to focus on our marriage. Our desire and drive to expand our family and share our love had consumed us. We wanted a child so desperately that it had become the center of our lives, and we had begun to lose sight of the things that made us a strong family to begin with.**_

_**However, the time away reinvigorated our love and our patience, which is what brings me to today. For years I have written in this journal letters of love, hope and prayers I have had for my forever child. I've even on occasion thought I knew just which child would receive this journal upon their official adoption, but today I finally know without a doubt that you will be our forever child.**_

_**Your father and I promise to love you and guide you in every way that we can. I wish that I could promise to be the perfect parent, but it is without a doubt that we will make mistakes over the years. However, I can assure you that our love will never fail.**_

_**Not the bone of my bone or the flesh of my flesh, but through God's plan, miraculously ours.**_

I closed the journal and wiped away a tear as I wound the leather cords around it once more before holding it to my heart. It had been a long time since I cried as many tears as I had today, but these were a different kind of tears than I had ever been privileged to cry.

A phone call had awakened my summer sleep this morning, and nothing had surprised me more than to hear Diana's voice on the other end of the phone. I was worried something had happened to Christopher, Lilly or Olivia, but I was flabbergasted by the news she was bestowing on me. The call, in fact, had nothing to do with the children, but rather with their birth mother, Daphne. Their mother was pregnant again, due any day, and Diana was simply at her max capacity with five children in her home. When she had declined custody of the new baby, the social worker had asked if there were any alternatives. She informed the social worker that Edward and I would be the perfect family for the new baby and explained our connection. Since the birth parents' rights had been terminated not only from the first three children, but as well to any future children, when this baby was be born it would be a ward of the state.

I was forced to redial the caseworker's number six times because my hands were shaking so badly. It was simply too good to be true that there was a baby waiting for us. I spent hours on the phone being passed from one department to another, being ensured that Diana's words were the truth. That this child, this infant was to be our forever child. I'd written a text message to Edward but decided against sending it, wanting desperately to ensure this was real first.

Now I carefully peeled the mess away, throwing it in the trash. Words written in pretty script littered the dining table, and I bundled them up before walking to the front door.

I rolled a piece of tape up and slid it onto the back of the first paper taping 'hoped for' to the place where he usually hung his bag upon his arrival.

A little farther down the hall, I taped the words 'wished for', continuing the way to the kitchen with the phrases 'wanted', 'grown in our hearts', and 'forever ours'. I paused as my eyes filled with tears as I slid my fingers over the words I was scant to believe would ever happen for us: 'forever ours. A blessing worth the wait.'

As I stepped into the kitchen, my eyes landed on the sign I had labored over for an hour, trying to pass the time until Edward arrived home and we could celebrate together. 'Congratulations, Daddy!' the sign proclaimed. I seated myself at the table again, trying desperately not to watch the clock too anxiously as I counted down the moments until he arrived home.

When nearly twenty minutes later, the door finally opened, I held my breath to contain the news that I felt was ready to burst from my lips. I chewed on my bottom lip anxiously as I listened carefully as I anticipated some sort of reaction.

"Bella?" His voice was uncertain from half way down the hall; I had to grip the base of my chair to keep myself from going to him.

"Did you get a little-" Edward's eyes landed on the sign hanging above my head as he stood frozen in the entrance of the kitchen. "You're pregnant?" he whispered, the confusion evident in his voice as he searched my face.

"Not at all," I whispered as I stood up, my hands resting on my flat stomach as I took a deep breath. "I received a phone call this morning..."

"Another foster child?" His brow furrowed as he shook his head as he studied the words he'd gathered in his hands.

"Of sorts. It's Lilly and Chris's mom. She's pregnant, but she doesn't have parental rights any longer."

"What about Diana? Love, I don't want you to get your hopes up." His voice was gentle as he gathered me in his arms.

"She's the one who called me this morning," I explained. "She is at her max capacity. She doesn't think she can handle any more, so she told the social worker that she wanted us to take the baby."

"But the courts could always make a different decision," he protested softly.

"I talked to everyone today, baby. In a situation like this, Diana has the final say. They won't give the parents back custody. This is our baby. No one is going to take it from us," I whispered as the tears started again as he crushed me against his chest in a hug. He whispered against my hair even if it was unintelligible to me. I felt his body shake, and his tears hit my neck; I knew we were in the same place.

It was this overwhelming sense of unexplainable joy, the reality that the thing we had fought so hard for was within in our grasp. Our baby was finally a reality. The love for a child I had yet to hold in my arms, that had yet to take its first breath in the world had stolen my heart. It was an all-consuming love that would only grow and expand over the years.

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**Public voting: August 26, 2013 to September 13, 2013.**


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